ROFL! Get ‘em God! Watch ‘em burn… so hilarious! They thought they were so awesome, so proud, but our God beat the living shit out of them. Watch them die!

I don’t know what you mean, Quester, Christianity is so full of humor!

I know, I’m diabolical…

A drunk staggers out of a bar and lurches down the street until he comes upon the door of a Catholic Church. He shoves them open and goes in. After a few moments getting his bearings, he spots the confessional and crashes through the pews to get inside.
The priest sees this and decides that this fellow must really need help. So he goes and gets in the other side of the confessional.
After a few moments of silence, the priest says, “Can I help you my son?”
The drunk’s voice comes back, “I dunno. Does your side have any toilet paper?”

Suddenly, the Catholic sees an open parking space up ahead. Taking a deep breath he says “Never mind Lord, I found one”.

Some parts may sound familiar. It starts off, “I…I think it’s finally over. Our reactionary emotional response seems to have stopped it dead in its tracks. If I’m right, all we have to do now is smugly reiterate our half-formed thesis and—oh, no! For the love of God, no! It’s thoughtfully mulling things over!

Run! Run! It’s making reasonable, fact-based arguments!

Quickly! Hide behind self-righteousness! The ad hominem rejoinders—ready the ad hominem rejoinders! Watch out! Dodge the issue at hand! Question its character and keep moving haphazardly from one flawed point to the next!”

Here lies atheist
Jonathon Snow;
All dressed up,
and no place to go.

—————————————
An atheist walks into a bar and finds a priest, a rabbi, and an imam in boisterous discussion at a table in the back. Ignoring them, he orders fish and chips with a pint of beer and sits down, far away from the raucous theological discussion. Or so he hoped.
After a few moments, the priest approaches his table. “Pardon me, sir,” says the priest, “but you look a little lonely by yourself. Would you like to join us in the back?”
“No thanks, mate,” says the atheist. “I’m not into all that god stuff.”
“But God is the most important thing in the universe!” replied the priest. “How can you be disinterested in the Almighty?”
The atheist banged his fist on the table rudely, clattering his pint and his fish and chips. “I’m just trying to have a bite here. Just leave me alone, and let me eat.”
The priest scoffs off back to his table, and the atheist is left alone for a while.
After a few more minutes, the rabbi approaches the atheist’s table. “Surely you don’t mean what you said. God shouldn’t be a burden, or an annoyance. Having and keeping the divine should be a joy in your life.”
The atheist stands up, and turns to the rabbi. “This is why religion is losing members,” he said, and he banged his fist on the table again and again. His beer wobbled. “It’s because you won’t stop bothering people when they’re just trying to have a meal!”
By this time, the imam had rushed up to the atheist’s table. “Sir, please, calm down, please!” he cried.
The atheist turned on him. “And what do you want?” he yelled as he slammed his fist down on the table one more time.
Suddenly there was a crash. Behind him, his fish and his beer crashed onto the floor and the plate and glass shattered into a hundred pieces.
Amid the stunned silence of the pub, the imam softly spoke up. “Sir, I was just trying to save your sole!”

A pastor knocked on a parishioner’s door but got no answer. He left a note on the door that said, “Behold. I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears and invites me in, I will sup with him and he with me.” Rev. 3:20

Next Sunday there was a note on the pulpit. It said, “I heard your voice in the garden but I was naked so I hid myself.” Gen. 3:10.